


smoke

by fireangelnblw



Series: valdangelo [2]
Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Bisexual Male Character, Canon Gay Character, Depression, Everyone Is Gay, First Meetings, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, M/M, Philosophy, Prequel, Queer Themes, Smoking, Social Anxiety, Trans Male Character, Underage Drug Use, i'll probably continue this?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 18:39:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17565896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireangelnblw/pseuds/fireangelnblw
Summary: nico had never seen a motherfucker like him before.





	smoke

**Author's Note:**

> the prequel to soft. can be read before or after.

the cold wind that hit nico felt more welcoming than deadly.

 

as the door closed behind him, he felt all of his nerves calm down, the deafening music of the party reduced to a mere muffled hum behind him, though he still felt the thunder of the bass through the thumping of the floor. the porch he walked out to looked over the bay a few miles away, where there were cargo ships and gigantic cranes looming over the dark black waters. the sky, as always, was devoid of stars, save for the crescent moon glowing in the abyss. the breeze was chilly as said before, the october days getting shorter with each leaf drop. it was as if nico’s hope for a long cold night was coming true.

 

nico went down the little wooden steps down to the concrete path leading to the garage and driveway, but he didn’t follow it. he opted to walk around to the back of the house, his feet padding against the wet grass of the backyard, softly crunching each blade with his leather boots. he shoved his hands in his pockets, feeling around for any money he had left in his jacket from the last time he used it. he pulled out a twenty, sighed in relief, then placed it back.

 

he continued his treck until he had rounded the entire half of the house, reaching the back. the pool was empty for some weird reason (maybe people were too busy getting it on in the house for swimming in a body of water). it was all empty, save for a figure on a lone brick wall that overlooked the city beyond. the figure didn’t speak, which meant that they hadn’t noticed nico come through. nico saw a puff of smoke escape from under their hood, an exhale just barely heard. nico’s never smoked before, but he was mesmerized by the little cloud escaping the stranger’s lips. maybe he wasn’t the only one who didn’t enjoy parties.

 

parties, especially these types of bass-booming extravaganzas, were a waste of time. the music was always played to the point where it made your ears filled with wax, the only drinks they handed out were bottles of vodka and pee trapped in glass jars, people were dancing and grinding on each other without realizing how stupid they looked. intoxication, chaos, and the endless questions of “are you single?” was enough to make nico’s stomach churn. celebrations were never nico’s ideal type of passing time.

 

he was literally only here because of his father. the person who invited everyone in school to their house had let it slip to him, and his father told him he should go and make some friends since the only other person he hung out with was hazel. “you’ve been cooped up in your room for too long,” his father said over breakfast. “you don’t even have to go inside, just… try to get to know at least one person. it’s going to help you.” he was thankful that his father cared for him despite how weird he showed it, but he still didn’t like parties. he just entered the house, stayed for one minute, then left to the porch outside because god, it was bad already-

 

nico leaned against a window, ignoring a couple making out right on it. he let out a breath, staring up at the starless sky, wondering why he even transferred to this school. sure, the last one was bad but at least people ignored him. now he has to deal with a bunch of people tapping his arm and trying to catch his attention. hazel seemed to be fitting in just fine, but nico didn’t _want_ to fit in. he just wanted to finish high school.

 

he looked at the stranger on the wall, but noticed that their body was turned toward his direction. _speak of the devil_. the dude was looking right at him.

 

“hey,” the anonymous entity said. “you don’t like it either?”

 

nico debated whether to answer because he was _not_ in the mood for a chat. he went for a short reply, but making it stupid so the person would lose interest. “like what?”

 

“the party,” the stranger answered. they held up a cigarette packet. “want some?”

 

nico shook his head.

 

the person shrugged. “suit yourself. though the couple on the window is probably fucking now so you might want to go somewhere else.”

 

nico turned around and _okay, he did not want to see that_. he turned back to the shadow on the wall and wondered if he should join them. he didn’t like social interaction in the slightest, but then again he didn’t want to eavesdrop on an intimate interaction between partners in any way, shape, or form. so he pushed himself from his sitting position on the window sill to walk around the pool to the far side, getting closer to the person, now lifting a cigarette to their mouth and blowing out.

 

“good choice,” the stranger laughed, but not in a mocking way. their voice was crackling and rough, like a bonfire, with a slight spanish accent.

 

nico ignored them and vaulted the wall, easily lifting himself up to the top and swinging both his legs over until they loomed over the steep grass hillside, leading down into a beautiful world of fireflies. the lights of the buildings made up for the forgotten ones in the sky. it stretched out all the way up to the horizon, where nico could see a cell tower blinking a red light at him, as if warning him that this was a bad idea. the crescent moon was still illuminated overhead.

 

“it’s pretty,” the smoker said, a few inches away from nico. they were wearing a **_thrasher magazine_ **shirt under a forest green military jacket, one string longer than the other and the hoodie masking their face. their destroyed jeans revealed red fishnets underneath, and they wore hiking boots that were stained with grease and dirt near the souls. in one hand they held an orange lighter, small and pocket-size, in the other their current cigarette. the cigar box was seated between them and nico.

 

nico nodded. he could stand a few or more minutes with this guy until he was allowed to come home (his father told him he could be back by midnight), but he didn’t want to talk. or he did, but he knew that starting a conversation with the topics in his mind was futile. he stuck to silence, with no sense of awkwardness or comfort.

 

the person twirled their cigarette in their left hand, turning their head to nico. “you don’t like smoking?”

 

nico shrugged. “never tried it before. my dad would probably kill me anyway.”

 

“you don’t look like the type who would listen to their parents,” the stranger said, playing with the lighter in their hand.

 

nico didn’t even think of the next words that came out of his mouth. “you don’t look like the type who _has_ parents.”

 

nico expected the stranger to punch him or call him a jackass (which he sort of deserved) but was surprised when the guy just laughed. his stomach churned with something with something other than acid, hearing the angel of a laugh that sounded so genuine, so down-to-earth and warm. the stranger laughed so hard that they started wheezing, and they pulled off their hoodie just to catch more chilly air to calm themself down.

 

and- _holy shit_.

 

the stranger was close to his age, with warm castory skin with tints of darkness on his cheeks. his eyebrows were bushy and wild, small clumps of hair forming an almost invisible unibrow. his lips were dark and plush despite being cracked and bleeding from the cold, his jet black hair kinky and falling to the small of his neck. he had a small gold nose ring and a few earrings, with one that had a clamp on his ear cartilage. nico noticed something he hadn’t noticed before - a small choker with a cross hanging from it. but the thing that caught his entire attention was his warm brown eyes, the color of forest trees and glowing firewood, sepia like rich soil and gorgeous mountains. his eyelashes framed his soft orbs, long and black.

 

he was… he was…

 

_what was this?_

 

“oh, man,” the boy said, still smiling from nico’s words, eye crinkling adorably. “i walked into that one, didn’t i?”

 

“sorry,” nico mumbled, casting a look down at his feet to hide his burning face. he didn’t know if he was blushing from the words that had escaped his mouth or the beautiful angel next to him. or maybe he was a devil? you couldn’t look that pretty without a catch. nico didn’t know how someone with so many moles and acne and pimples galore could be so breathtaking to look at. maybe it was his tiny nose or his crooked teeth or his small scars that cut through his cheekbones and chin. maybe it was his warm skin like volcanic rock or the dark circles under his pretty, pretty eyes.

 

why was his body acting this way? did he drink something or some shit?

 

“it’s fine, it’s fine.” the person waved his cigarette hand dismissively. “you just threw me off. i guess it’s because it’s true.” he placed down his lighter on the wall and used it to stick out at nico. his hand looked roughed up and dry, his nails clipped a little over the pink area.

 

“i’m leo,” he introduced. “leo valdez.”

 

nico didn’t know why but he took it. “nico di angelo.” he ignored how warm it was, how comforting it was despite the hand being… well, a hand. he almost refused to let go.

 

“nico…” leo grabbed his lighter and put his burning cigarette down, taking out a small piece of paper from his pocket. “you’re the new transfer student, right? i’ve seen you around school.”

 

“yeah,” nico replied. “i went to a private school for freshman year. got kicked out the first two week.”

 

“why?”

 

“i burned someone’s hand off in biology.”

 

leo laughed again, a hearty passionate one that didn’t last as long as nico wanted it to. “and i thought i was bad with fire.” he began lighting the piece of paper with the orange lighter, a small fire produced and starting to eat the paper up slowly. “one time i burned one of my foster homes down and ran away while they were calling the fire department. they caught me the next day in a different county and i had to be shipped to another home because i’m pretty sure the family i was staying with had me on a wanted list. probably the biggest stunt i’ve ever pulled.”

 

nico looked at him. “you’re kidding.”

 

leo blew out the fire just as it had reached his fingertips. “i am. about setting the house on fire, not the foster home thing.” he looked nico directly in his eyes. “and i’m pretty sure you’re kidding too.”

 

nico held up his hands in mock surrender. “you caught me.”

 

leo smiled in triumph and stuffed the ashy paper into his jacket again.

 

they were in a comfortable silence for a while. nico’s never been in a comfortable silence. people just couldn’t grasp the idea that some people hate small talk, that filling the air with meaningless noise was a waste of time. it was annoying. but with leo, it suddenly felt okay. even as the converation drifted off into silence, it wasn’t enforced. like leo knew what nico wanted. nico felt his eyes wander over leo’s body - his slumped shoulders, his thin arms with some muscle to them, his near flat stomach hidden in the comfort of his black shirt, his feet tapping on the wall as if spelling out words with only minor sounds, his thighs apart and relaxed on the brick… jesus christ, nico felt like a creeper right now. he willed himself to look away and back to the city line far across the distance.

 

“you like the school?” leo questioned suddenly.

 

nico shrugged. “it’s fine. the people are annoying and actually try to talk to me. it’s different from my last school.”

 

“everyone ignored you?” leo raised an eyebrow. nico nodded. leo sighed. “same. well, back at my middle schools. i went to several cause i moved around a lot. you’re the kind of guy who likes being alone or something? i’m the opposite. i’m literally a slut for attention, all the time. i’d turn myself into a comic relief character if i could - just for some ounce of attention.”

 

nico was quiet for a while. the guy could rant but it wasn’t in a way that forced nico to be on his side. more like a vent session.

 

“just… i literally came to this stupid party just to hang out with my friends, but then i remembered i’m terrible in social situations and everyone was having fun and i didn’t want to ruin it with my stupid anxiety and interaction problems to i tried to leave but then i remembered that percy was my ride and i didn’t to hijack his car, and i don’t trust ubers or taxis so i just…” he gestured wildly around. “here.” leo must have realized he was telling all his personal problems to a guy he just met and frowned. “sorry.”

 

“don’t be,” nico said. “you know percy?”

 

“yeah, we have bio together. why?”

 

nico fought down a blush. “no reason.”

 

leo grinned. “you think he’s hot, don’t you?”

 

nico felt a cold knife slice his butterfly stomach in half. he felt his defenses rise up again, his fists clenching together in anticipation. god, he remembered that homophobes existed. despite the school outwardly supporting lgbtq+ rights and even having a gsa club that nico didn’t join because of reasons, he knew that were was a rock among the sea of birds, waiting to be thrown. nico glared at leo, trying not to clench his teeth.

 

“is that a bad thing?” he asked in a low voice.

 

he expected leo to laugh and agree with him, but instead he had on a confused face. leo blinked twice before realizing why nico was suddenly acting cold. “oh. no, it’s not. i honestly thought that liking percy jackson was a universal experience, gay or straight.”

 

nico felt the tension in his shoulders decrease. “sorry, i was just-”

 

“dude, you don’t have to apologize,” leo said, opting to rest his hand on nico’s shoulder. it felt so in place there. “it’s my fault. i don’t think when i say random shit. you like dudes?”

 

nico nodded.

 

“cool. i do too, probably more than ladies. bi pride. if i was ever homophobic, i would probably stab myself thirty-seven times in the chest.”

 

nico had to smile. “there wasn’t a lot of queer kids i knew where i grew up.”

 

leo laughed. “yeah, goode is like a magnet for queer kids. my friend piper’s a barely-functioning lesbian, percy is bi, jason is panromatic and ace, there’s like, what, ten trans peeps that i know by name, including me. this has probably been the gayest bunch i’ve ever been a part of. like a big ass queer therapy group. anyways, why did you ask if i knew percy? you know him?”

 

“yeah,” nico replied. “our fathers know each other, so we hang out a lot. he was the reason i came to this school.” _he’s the only one besides hazel who i feel comfortable talking to._

 

“what really happened back at your old one?”

 

“i was only there for a month before i opted out,” nico said. “my father saw that i was upset one day and i told him that were was… a fuckton of homophobic students. they had the word _faggot_ on the walls like it was some rebellious statement, i’ve heard a lot of homophobic comments from girl groups around, and i’m pretty sure one kid was bullied for being gay to the point of suicide so… i didn’t feel safe.” nico could still remember the all-too-familiar cramp he felt whenever he looked at that horrendous grafitti, sketched with black sharpie over the bathroom stalls. he thanked his father for getting him and hazel out of that dump. maybe this new school wasn’t all that bad despite a bunch of people wanting to make do with him.

 

leo was speechless for a minute or two. “damn,” leo muttered. understandable. “you’re lucky you got out of there. i’m proud of you.”

 

nico chuckled. “for what? telling my dad about my sexuality troubles?”

 

“i mean, yeah.” leo had picked up the cigar again, twirling it around like it was a baton, glaring at it. as if trying to make it burn up with his mind. “you don’t usually have the guts to tell your parents you’re an oppressed gay, much less a gay in general. my mom knew i was trans and i think she would’ve been fine with it if she found out that i liked boys, but then there was my other family and-” he had his hand clench around his throat, reenacting a choking motion. “boom, dead.”

 

nico felt empathy for him. being anything other but a cisheteronormative human being in public was the equivalent of murdering a child in broad daylight. it simply was considered _wrong_ , something that needed to be fixed because people aren’t used to seeing others that way. they aren’t used to seeing two girls in love or someone who is neither a woman nor a man. they aren’t used to the unknown, and instead of trying to understand it they try to murder it without wondering about the beauty of it all. nico wasn’t sad because he was gay. he was sad because other people didn’t want him to be. he fought down the urge to say _sorry_ , because this was one of those things that you couldn’t control, and neither could the other person.

 

“why did you come to this party?” leo asked, throwing the cigarette away, tossing it into a patch of grass.

 

nico sighed. “my dad told me to. he thinks i need to open myself up to other people, because he thinks that my wanting to be alone all the time is toxic and i’ll be a social recluse.”

 

“is he right?”

 

nico was quiet for a second. “yeah, he is.”

 

the two stared at the city lights. nico decided to continue, because leo was listening - because leo wanted to hear. “it’s not that i want to die alone. i want there to be people i can trust. but people are… stupid. they’re hypocritical to everything they say, they ignore people simply because they don’t like an aspect of them. they don’t think that anything they do has an impact on everyone else. they don’t want to hang out with a freak like me anyway, so what’s the point? the only people i trust are hazel, percy, and my father because they don’t think anything is just for consuming. i’d hang out with dead people if i could.”

 

 _i’d be dead if i could_. nico gripped his legs tightly, fighting down the urge to punch an invisible mirror. he’s glad he didn’t let that part slip out, though he wasn’t exactly ecstatic about letting that other stuff slide through his gates.

 

“that’s a big mood,” leo laughed, but it was small and almost exasperated. like he’s felt the same thing before. “people are confusing. i don’t understand them. emotions are stupid, social cues are weird, every little thing that you say is being recorded for processing and will determine whether or not you’re good enough being a friend. machines are easy - they’re simple, they perform one function and work well with other machines, and when they’re broken you can fix them or make a new one. it’s not hard.” he took out another cigarette from the box. “so why are people just…”

 

leo drifted off.

 

“just…” nico echoed.

 

“… people.” they finished simultaneously.

 

they didn’t know why but they started laughing. laughing so hard that leo nearly fell off the wall, so hard that nico accidentally dropped leo’s cigarette packet on the side of the wall where the pool was. it was almost hysterical, with nico’s cackle and leo’s wheeze that floated through the air into the night, and suddenly all of nico’s nerves were gone, all his anxiety thrown out the window because-

 

“man, we’re really fucked up,” leo giggled, staring at nico with eyes as bright as the makeshift stars themselves.

 

“yeah, yeah we are.” nico held back another laugh, allowing himself to just stare at leo’s face, lit up in the gorgeous moonlight that highlighted something even more. nico didn’t even care that leo might not like him back, because he actually found a friend like his dad had said, and this friend was someone that he had no idea would be such good company. he liked talking to leo. he liked staring at his laugh lines around his eyes and his tinted teeth that needed braces but never got one, his soft-looking cheeks and the cut that ran through his eyebrows, is moles like dark galaxies on his face and his lips that were pink and beautiful, and god nico had never seen a motherfucker like him before.

 

“you’re a ray of sunshine, di angelo,” leo said. nico’s never been called that before, but it made his cheeks redden.

 

“you’re not so bad yourself,” nico replied, softly punching leo’s arm. he suddenly remembered that he had knocked the cigarette packet off the wall and looked down, where he saw the box on the ground, all the contents spilled out and even making it to the pool, a punch of wrinkled cigs in the water. nico winced. “shit.”

 

“it’s fine,” leo waved it off. “i’ll buy more. i was gonna make a stop to the store actually. piper texted me a while ago that she had cramps and asked me if i could get her advil. do you wanna come with me?”

 

nico looked at him skeptically. “you don’t have a car.”

 

“yeah, but i have my feet.” leo swung his legs to the other side of the wall where the pool was and jumped down, landing almost gracefully on his feet. as if he had done that before. “you don’t have to come with. it’s only a few minutes walk. i’ll leave you alone for a bit.”

 

nico watched him start to walk. normally he wouldn’t follow if given the choice. he liked the idea of being solitary, liked not having to keep up the conversation with idiotic small talk and awkward silence. he liked being left alone with his thoughts. but seeing leo leave suddenly put his nerves on edge. right now, he didn’t want to be left alone. so he came down from the wall and jogged up to leo, who was at the side of the house by now. he caught up with him and nudged him in the shoulder.

 

“i’m coming with you,” nico said.

 

leo smiled. “of course you are.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> with the amount of attention i received from soft, i wrote this piece of shit. if you need any clearance, nico was in a private high school with hazel for a month or two before transferring to goode for reasons said above.


End file.
